4th of July Guide

You probably already have a pretty strong opinion of the 4th of July. It isn't exactly our favorite holiday either. Technically, we dsilke most holidays simply because of the intense amount of prolonged anxiety and lack of routine--and that is just my problem.

But back to the current holiday.

With 4th of July coming we are in need of taking many many precautions to prevent a meltdown worse than anticipated.  Irnocially, this year, I am much more worried about Matthew than Gabe.  Why?  Because Gabe goes to my mom's house for a fireworks-free night.  Matt on the other hand, he'll be home.  I have already ordered his noise canceling headphones to compliment his all-boy love of all-things fire related.  He is Jeff's mini-me afterall.

I am going to give you a list of things that *have* worked for us in the past, but are obviously no guarantee for your sensational kiddo, so as always, adjust where you see fit. : )

1. Give limited warning--it is my experience that if I talk too much about the noise that is coming and the problems Gabriel may or may not have he gets overwhelmed. I think the anticipation is just as bad, if not worse, than the event. Yes, Gabriel is clear on what 4th of July is and that it is coming, but we don't harp on it.  Same goes for Matthew -- he'll know it is coming, but we aren't going to focus on the 'noise'.

Gabe's New Bud

Gabriel officially has a new friend. Do you see him? He’s the dark haired boy, with the sparkly blue eyes and the kind heart (trust me, it's there) to the left. Yep. His name is Noah.

It is a little ironic that he shares his name with the famous Noah who saved the animals, two by two, during a rain storm, because in many ways, Gabriel has been in a storm this spring – and needed saving, both physically and emotionally.

Now their relationship has had its challenges, but what relationship hasn't?

The two unlikely buds met in class, Noah is 12 and in the 5th grade, and Gabriel is 9 and in second. Noah quickly felt as though it was his duty to protect Gabriel, being that he was the oldest and Gabriel was the youngest, that seemed natural. Noah has Autism, and this contributed to his desire to be Gabe’s guardian. Not a bad deal to have the biggest kid in class (technically there are only five kids..but still) as your best bud.

And you might think that it isn't a good idea for Gabriel to have an 'older' friend, but really, it is the best thing ever.  Gabriel already seems to 'play down' to those around him (given his HFA, he isn't mature, or even developmentally on target socially), and in our neighborhood there are mostly young kids, which doesn't give Gabriel the opportunity to have those kinds of social play skills modeled for him. The opportunity for him to 'look up to' someone is priceless.

FTF "Support Groups 101" by Carrie Fannin

Here is July's First Things First article, which was written by Carrie Fannin who is the mom to a beautiful teenage girl with multiple acronyms, as well as the WA State Parent Connections Host for the SPD Founation for the past 10 years, and founder of Sensory Planet, a social network dedicated to those caring for children with Sensory Processing Disorder.

For more information about First Things First click here. There is also a list of the previous First Things First articles under the "Interviews, Guest Posts & FTF" tab at the top -- with the obvious title of "First Things First Articles".

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Stanley Greenspan, the author of "The Challenging Child" (1995) had an insightful analogy to help us understand what people experience when they can not effectively process, or interpret, sensory input. He describes it this way:

"Imagine driving a car that isn't working well. When you step on the gas the car sometimes lurches forward and sometimes doesn't respond. When you blow the horn it sounds blaring. The brakes sometimes slow the car, but not always. The blinkers work occasionally, the steering is erratic, and the speedometer is inaccurate. You are engaged in a constant struggle to keep the car on the road, and it is difficult to concentrate on anything else."

It’s no wonder that children with sensory processing disorders feel out of control, exhibit a whole host of behaviors and have difficulty concentrating and focusing at school. But now, also imagine being a parent or caregiver of one of these children.