Advice for High Schoolers on the Spectrum -- with Claire LaZebnik

Since I don’t have any experience whatsoever with parenting teenagers, let alone teenagers on the spectrum, I had to find an expert that had survived the teenage years and lived to talk about it for my back to school series.

And I did just that. Meet Claire LaZebnik.

Claire co-authored the book, Growing Up on the Spectrum, with Dr. Lynn Kern Koegel and is proud to be an Autism Mom -- and is also giving away a copy of her book (Totally radical, dude...nevermind, that was cool when *I* was a teenager...not so much now....). So, who better to ask for tips to help parents that are just entering this new realm of life with their child than a woman who had done just that?

Since teenagers notably have a short attention span, let’s get right to the answers, shall we?

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Hi Claire! Welcome to HLW3B – so happy to have you here! Tell me a little about yourself, your family and your son?

Thanks for inviting me. Let’s see . . . I’m the mother of four kids: the oldest has autism, the second oldest has Celiac Disease, the third (and only girl) has Addison’s and Hashimoto’s Disease and the youngest has so far dodged any diagnoses, but we’ll see what the future brings. In spite of all that, we’re a happy, silly, busy family and everyone’s doing great. My husband and I are both writers. He’s a co-executive producer on “The Simpsons” and I write books—mostly novels (my fourth one, IF YOU LIVED HERE, YOU’D BE HOME NOW comes out this September) but I’ve co-written two non-fiction books about autism with Dr. Lynn Kern Koegel who, with her husband, Dr. Robert Koegel, runs the Koegel Autism Clinic at the University of California, Santa Barbara. I originally met Lynn to consult with her about our oldest son, who was five or six at the time. I was blown away by the program she and her husband had developed: it all stems out of ABA (applied behavioral analysis) but they had spent time reviewing tapes of old clients to see how they’d progressed over the last decade or so, and used that knowledge to pinpoint certain “pivotal behaviors”—behaviors which, when appropriately addressed and improved, bring about even greater widespread improvement. Everything she suggested we do with our son made a huge difference. I’m happy to say that this kid—who was completely non-verbal at three and still mostly echolalic at six—is heading off to college this fall. It’s been a long journey.

Interview with Haley Moss, Author and Teenager with High Functioning Autism

When I see young kids with Autism or Asperger’s advocating for themselves, I get a sudden rush of excitement, followed quickly by an intense feeling of pride.

Although my children are not writing books, or getting interviewed by CNN, I do envision them some day being strong enough to tell their story, to share their experiences and to make a difference for the next generation of kids.

So, when I saw the new book, Middle School: The Stuff Nobody Tells You About, by 16 year old Haley Moss, I wanted to hear her story.

Turns out this young woman is nothing short of amazing.

She has not only become an author while still in high school, but is an incredible artist (she created all of the artwork for the book, including the cover). She is creative, has a great memory, can write poetry and says that she looks only at the positives of her Autism. Her mother told her about Autism by likening her ‘special talents’ to those of J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter. And given Haley’s success, I’d say that the metaphor of her skills being ‘magical’ is fitting.

Haley comes across as a typical teenager, and even sounded like one during her CNN interview last April, when asked how her friends were taking her success, she responded with modest teenage charm, “Everyone is keeping it on the down low.”

Thankfully, she is here today to talk about her book which is aimed at explaining middle school to kids with autism, and their parents; from how to get through the classes, making friends, decoding texting acronyms and maybe most importantly (to me!), she even explains new slang, like “Down Low.”

So, if you have a child in middle school, entering middle school, or maybe you are like me and are already anticipating middle school with a certain sense of dread regardless of how far away it is; this is for you! Oh, and did I mention she is giving away a copy of her book? Oh, yes she is!

IMHO, U R in for a treat, and IIRC, many of U have kids the same age as Haley, so don’t say you’ll BRB, stay, read the interview and LOL with us! (Translation at the bottom of the page!)

Interview With Taylor Morris -- An Exceptional Teenage Girl with Aspergers

I have the distinct privilege of welcoming Taylor Morris to my blog today. Taylor is an amazing young girl, who has Aspergers Syndrome, and is bringing awareness to the value of self-advocating for children and young adults with Autism Spectrum Disorders. Her insightful videos give answers to parents desperate to understand where their child’s mind is, why it goes there and how to reach them. I encourage you to take a minute and view Autism through the eyes of this exceptional young woman.

I have to admit that I am a little nervous to ask Taylor all of my questions – I think that is because I have never sat down and asked my ‘autism’ questions to a person with autism. I am overwhelmingly thankful that Taylor and her mother have agreed to have her participate in this interview. A big thank you to both of them for allowing me such an invaluable insight into autism and on behalf of me and my readers, thank you for allowing us the opportunity to better understand our children!

There really isn't anything better than hearing it directly from the source, is there?

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Welcome Taylor – thank you for joining me here on HLW3B! I have been intrigued by the videos on your website (www.meettaylormorris.com), discussing everything from your insider point of view of a therapy session as a preschooler to explaining your own world in calm detail. I think as a parent of a child with autism (HFA), I am mostly impressed with the confident and self-assured way you have of expressing yourself. To what do you attribute your ability to be so self aware?

I think I started being self-aware when my parents would remind me of the consequences of my actions. Having my parents tell me that something comes off as rude forces me to realize that I am one person who has to learn to function in a world with many others. This creates a self-awareness of my actions. My parents comments and hard lessons on the playground nudged me to realize the way I act and how present myself has much larger implications then I had previously thought. They taught me that being myself is much more then just doing whatever I want. From here I began to grow to be the person I am; I say what I truly believe but I calculate the implications of my actions as well. I believe this is what makes me come off as a mature self-aware person.